In wrapping up this series, Be Your Authentic Self, I want to look at how we should respond to criticism—whether fair or unfair. But first, let’s briefly review where we’ve been.
A Quick Review
In Part I–Like Children Sitting in The Marketplace, I said that the hardest thing you will ever be is yourself—your authentic self—because of the constant pressure to conform and fit in rather than stand out.
In Part II–Don’t Dance to Another Person’s Tunes, we saw from Jesus’ example that we live in a world full of fault-finders. Both He and John the Baptist were criticized. As Jesus said:
“For John came neither eating nor drinking, and they say, ‘He has a demon.’ The Son of Man came eating and drinking, and they say, ‘Here is a glutton and a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and sinners.’” (Matthew 11:18–19)
No matter what stand you take, someone will be offended. If, like John, you refrain from eating and drinking, you’ll be criticized. And if, like Jesus, you do eat and drink, you’ll still be criticized.
In Part III–Beware Those Who Throw Stones, we noted that critics are often hypocrites who fail to live by the same standards they demand of others. We also looked at a conversation Jesus had with His opponents as a model for how we should respond.
Learn from Criticism
But here’s the real question: since we know we’ll be criticized no matter what, should we just ignore it? The answer is no. You should never dismiss criticism outright—not even the negative ones. To dismiss it is to assume you’re always right. There’s always something to learn, and criticism can help you grow.
“Whoever remains stiff-necked after many rebukes will suddenly be destroyed—without remedy.” (Proverbs 29:1 NIV)
If you are corrected about the same issue by different people, it may be God trying to get your attention.
“If you listen to constructive criticism, you will be at home among the wise.” (Proverbs 15:31 NLT)
The truth is, you won’t always be right. Sometimes you’ll make mistakes, and others will point them out. But even then, remember this:
“He knows our frame; He remembers that we are dust.” (Psalm 103:14)
God accepts you as you are, flaws and all. Yet His acceptance doesn’t mean He wants you to stay the same. He calls you to grow. That’s why I strongly disagree with preachers—really more like motivational speakers—who claim you’re fine just the way you are and don’t need to change. If you attend a church where that’s the message, and you’re serious about your walk with God, my advice is simple: run. That mindset is a lie.
In John 8:1–11, Jesus forgave and accepted the woman caught in adultery, but He also told her, ‘Go and sin no more’ (v. 11). In the same way, even though He accepts you as you are today, it is not okay to continue in anything the Bible calls sin—whether premarital or extramarital sex, lying, stealing, cheating, or anything else.
Paul makes it clear in Ephesians:
“...He gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers, for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ, till we all come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a perfect man, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ.” (Ephesians 4:11–13)
The NLT puts verse 13 this way:
“...that we will be mature in the Lord, measuring up to the full and complete standard of Christ.”
God’s goal is for us to become like His Son, Jesus Christ. That’s the standard. You are not called to become like your pastor or anyone else. Paul himself said:
“Imitate me, just as I also imitate Christ.” (1 Corinthians 11:1)
It’s fine to learn from godly examples, but only as far as they reflect Christ. No human being—no matter how good—is the ultimate standard. Jesus alone is.
Live Authentic Despite Criticism
Young people, in particular, often struggle with this. The desire for approval—or the fear of criticism—from friends, coworkers, or even family can tempt you to compromise. Peter warned against this:
“...they think it strange that you do not run with them in the same flood of dissipation, speaking evil of you. They will give an account to Him who is ready to judge the living and the dead.” (1 Peter 4:4–5 NLT)
In the end, you are not accountable to people but to God.
So yes, you should expect criticism and weigh it carefully—both the good and the bad. But your life must ultimately align with God’s Word and your own Bible-shaped convictions. Criticism is inevitable. People will question your choices, values, and decisions. But don’t let that keep you from living true to the calling God has placed on your life.
Whenever you are unfairly or even falsely criticized, do what Jesus did—take the high road every time, because in the end, God’s approval is what matters most.
God has called you to live authentically—not by the world’s standards, but by His. Resolve today to be your authentic self.
If you haven’t been following this series, I encourage you to go back and read the earlier parts mentioned above.